“It’s been over a decade since I ended my long-term affair yet I could feel the trauma of living that lie like it was happening right now.” I had a rare dream about James last night. Probably because he popped up in my email by some sort of spam from his contact list. What was … More Trauma and 13 Years Later
If you’ve been following my story, you may be wondering what happened with the person that literally changed the course of my life. The time between the retreat, my divorce and a few years into being single, our relationship became fragmented, diluted. It’s not surprising as I had changed the playing field, thus the rules … More James
A continuation from The Invitation It’s been a very long time since the post above. There are 10 excuses why I stopped, none of them good really. I feel very emotional as I sit here and begin to pick up where I left off. It’s time to finish my story. I will do my best … More The Retreat
A continuation from A Book Is All It Took. I could not believe that my pithy email had been read by a real live person and that they were reaching out to me! I called the woman back who had left the message. She simply said that the author would like to have me on … More The Invitation
Fear Becomes Me, Part Two, is where I last left my story of divorce. If I had to name the darkest hour of my life, it would be where I am now in my story. The fear of being sick ruled my mind, and thus my life on every level. It was a miserable existence … More A Book Is All It Took
[Here in my little not-so-private space, I have ever-so-slowly been sharing my story of divorce. Part One left off with my husband’s discovery of my affair and my struggles with the stress of it all.] I have spent a good amount of time on the St. Clair river. Enormous freighters frequently pass through its deep … More Fear Becomes Me, Part Two
“Lies and secrets, Tessa, they are like a cancer in the soul. They eat away what is good and leave only destruction behind.” ― Cassandra Clare, Clockwork Prince So, there I was on a runaway train. I contemplated often on how to get out of my situation. The thought to leave my husband never really … More Fear Becomes Me, Part One
If you had seen me on the street 10 years ago, you may have thought, “What a perfect family.” You may have described us as happy, loving, clean, and beautiful. We had the perfect house, perfect beautiful children, we were all slim and healthy, we had money, we had it all. You may have even … More Judging a book by its cover.
This post is a continuation of my story, the last related post being, My Decent. My story is a cautionary tale in some sense. I came through it a better person, thankfully, and that is why I have chosen to tell it. I will be judged and that is OK. I will be embarrassed and … More A secret life.
I am what I like to call an AOL casualty. Back in 1997, I was introduced to AOL and its dangerously addictive Instant Messaging and Chat Rooms. This new and exciting phenomenon was like a drug put in front of our faces. I partook of it like so many others. There were no warning labels, … More My decent…