Sometimes…sometimes after making a decision to do something because you can not live another moment without making that decision, you crack. Your nervous system goes on the fritz when the reality of your audible words set in; you scramble to undo it, to bring everything back to the way it was. To the safe place … More The Aftermath
My little voice inside told me she would guide me. She was so loud and clear on what felt like my 99th dark night of the soul that there was no denying it. The impact was visceral and I reveled in the temporary reprieve it gave my nervous system. This reprieve allowed me to drop, … More Decisions, decisions, decisions…
I answered the call to Yellowstone and back. Back. That’s where I was in late 2020. Back home after the adventure of a lifetime trying to figure out what the hell it all meant. What was the purpose of that undeniable call just to be back in the same worn-out situation of my marriage? All … More The Muck and the Mire
“I clung to anything different than the constant drone of my fears and a life of groundhog days.” “I CAN’T FUCKING DO THIS!” That’s me flat on my back screaming with my arms and legs flailing about like a dying cockroach somewhere in the Pyrenees Mountains of France, or maybe Spain. I’m not sure I … More Redefining Adventure: Running Away to Healing
Yes, unoriginal title, but mandatory no? Americans walking the El Camino normally fly into Paris and take the train down to the starting point in St. Jean Pied-de-Port, France, where one begins this delicious journey by crossing the Pyrenees mountains into Spain. We decided to give ourselves at least one day to play in Paris … More American in Paris, Circa 2016
I am currently reading Deepak Chopra’s, “The Book of Secrets.” This excerpt stuck out to me today: Pitfalls of the Seeker: 1. Knowing where you are going. 2. Struggling to get there. 3. Using someone else’s map. 4. Working to improve yourself. 5. Setting a time table. 6. Waiting for a miracle. This is exactly … More Pitfalls of the Seeker
I love being under water. The weightlessness. All sounds fade away. My entire body is being touched all at once by the softness of the water. It’s such a strange feeling because when you are fully submerged, you don’t feel wet. It’s just comfort, like a warm cozy blanket. The few seconds of time that … More Silence
She looks so cold. The gray blue sky behind the squiggles of branches reminds me of something out of a horror movie. Cold pale skin and blue veins. Her arms reach out, extending her fingers, grasping for something. Reaching. Maybe it’s my mood that has turned this symbol of nature into a forlorn creature. Maybe … More A Season
On Monday I wrote a post entitled, “Letting Go.” The focus was on letting go of destructive behavioral patterns more than attachments to physical things. However, later that day as I was driving in my car, I was listening to the book on CD, You Are Here by Thich Nhat Hanh and none to my surprise, … More Attachments
As I begin a new chapter of sorts in my life, the following three words have been on my mind: Attachments Control Distractions I am slowly learning that I can have a preference for the way I would like things to happen, but I must avoid an attachment to it. What I want and what … More Letting Go
The Heroine's Adventure 